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November 20, 2005

‘Category 7’ Review: Please don’t try this at home

Sure, everyone involved in CBS’s miniseries “Category 7: The End of the World,” which aired earlier this month, must have known it was ridiculous: The many references to a “Category 7” hurricane; the fact the same system responsible for the destruction of Chicago was reforming over Detroit more than a week later; the ability to switch off a hurricane with 400 mph winds; and as long as the air temperature was at or below 79.2 degrees, it would completely dissipate faster than a commercial break, leaving sunlight and birdsong.

I hope everyone realized the most ridiculous thing about this movie was the characters’ constant need to get into a vehicle and drive in the middle of this monster storm. Isn’t it funny how the path of destruction leaves just enough room for a truck to get through? In reality, getting into a vehicle is about as smart as deciding to do some kite-flying amid such a storm. You wouldn’t see me grabbing the keys — unless it’s days before an impending storm and well before many people decide to evacuate.

Another “low-light” of the miniseries was when a couple of weather nerds, who are supposed to know better, tried to pick up a downed utility pole. Sure, that would provide them with an escape from the storm — by electrocution.

As usual, the really bad guys die the most horrendous deaths, and one really good guy dies heroically. What I wasn’t expecting to see: Brenda from “90210” hook up with the crazy tornado-chaser, played by Randy Quaid. Romance must make its way in to every miniseries, even when “the end of the world” is in the title.

If there’s a “Category 8” next May, will I watch? Sure, if only to see whether the jerky camera zooms make me even more nauseous. I haven’t been that seasick since I stopped watching “NYPD Blue.”

Believably: Tropical Depression strength (and this is being generous)
Comedy/Entertainment Value: Weak Category 1 hurricane strength

Arrow‘Category 6: Day of Destruction’ review

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